Depressed...

almost a month ago I put out a cry for help on blogger...

no one answered. I guess I'm not fucking surprised that nobody on here cares about my dad and me. Thanks for nothing guys.

Nobody cares about an old man who just got over pneumonia and then comes home to see that his family had let his garden die...

I did end up talking to dad about the whole thing. He is heart broken over it- just like I knew he would be.

Sometimes he really wishes the rest of the family would help in the garden, like I am. He also said that even though he knows they never will, he wishes they'd at least take an interest once in a while- at least come out and look!

When he was a kid, he and my uncles would help grandpa in the garden- that garden was a lot bigger and a lot better. They had fresh vegetables almost every day during the summer; they pickled, dried, and canned other stuff that lasted part way through the winter.

This garden, besides being late to sow, is much smaller. I told him that next year we'd double it, till a larger patch of earth and plant twice as many vegetables.

He didn't have anything to say, all he did was smile, but his face told me that he doubted it would happen. I'm going to prove to him that I'm serious.

I asked him what we could do to get mom and my siblings to come out to the garden once in a while and he just looked panged.

"Nothing makes a difference." Was all he said.

Well that's bullshit, I'm going to make something make a difference eventually.

But the conversation made me feel bad, so I tried to distract dad from the whole business. We went out to the garden today, did some weeding and more importantly did some thinning. I had sowed many of the seeds too close together.

I'll make a post about that later when I'm less depressed.